Updated: May 13
So attached to the human form,
it is hard not to take things personally.
Because I am a person,
or so I think.
I made a home out of the constellation of
blood and nerves and honeyed skin.
It functions on its own accord.
Subconsciously, unconsciously, consciously.
But this sophisticated machine
breaks down periodically.
And is periodically broken into.
Its walls have betrayed me.
Too soft, and inviting
in a callous world,
where wolves disguise themselves as men,
Take and take for the taking.
Gut me like a floundering fish.
Strip me of my womanhood,
until I forget what being a woman meant.
This body was a gracious country,
baring strange fruit,
turned waste land.
Verdant field dried up, sun scorched.
Bustling city to ghost town.
Am I ruined?
A lover once told me my pain was too heavy.
So I attempted to hide it.
Shoved the past under the Persian rug,
seams ripping apart, silken threads on oak floors.
Misery demands much room,
Where to house the grief,
if not this body?
I contract and make myself smaller.
Speak less, am seen less, do less.
It is a puny muted way to live.
Safer, yet more prolix.
There are less intruders now.
The men cannot see the door,
and attempt to stomp it down.
But what if there is nothing more to protect?
Everything I held dear to me,
has already been stripped bare.
The mosaic desk lamp,
the velvet arm chair,
the leather-bound notebook.
Nothing was ever mine to keep,
not even myself.
Roxanne is a New Yorker turned nomad, currently living on an island in Thailand.
She works as a developmental editor and ghost writer, bringing other’s stories to fruition.
Roxanne has spent many years of her existence on a quest for truth and unraveling the many complexities of the human condition. Beyond her designated roles of writer, teacher, and humanitarian, she is a lover; a lover of life and all beings.
Connect with her on Instagram at roxy_vn
Check out her work at https://roxannenagarwalla.home.blog/blog/blackout poetry , poetry books , slam poetry , ancient love poetry, boudoir photography , nude photography , still life photography , cg artwork , artwork singulart , nowness, nowness in residence , nowness submissions , style like u, colors, warsan shire, cover letter for poetry submission, poetry submission format, def jam poetry, poetry magazine, frontier poetry, selectism, muzzle magazine, mubi, poet, writers workshop, writers submission, poet submission, tracy k smith , poetry out loud , contemporary poetry , natasha trethewey , modern poetry , complete poems , mary oliver , william butler yeats , elizabeth bishop , poet laureate , prose , literary criticism , walt whitman , young poet , free verse , lyric , artist interview, interviews, poet interview, maya angelou , Joy Harjo , treefort artist submission , art basel artist submission , rolling loud artist submission , tappan collective artist submission , kinfolk , azeema , a3c artist submission, where to submit your artwork , how to write an artist submission , south by southwest artist submission , pottery barn artist submission , saatchi art artist submission , how to submit lyrics to artists , comic artist submission , deviantart art , how to submit art to magazines , art contest submission guidelines , how to submit to an art gallery , online art magazines , best online art magazine , online art magazine submission , online art magazines uk , what is the best art magazine , best art photography magazines , biggest art magazines , online art poetry magazine contest , free online poetry magazines , best online poetry magazine , poetry magazines accepting online submissions uk , online poetry literary magazine , popular poetry magazines , short story submissions , where to submit short stories , photography art submissions , best magazines for photography submissions , best creative magazines , best creative magazines accepting submissions , roxanne noor , brogan dinsdale , patrick schiefen